


Moondance

by octothorpetopus



Category: Law & Order: SVU
Genre: Bisexual Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr., Cute, Dancing, Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr. & Amanda Rollins Friendship, Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr. Has a Crush, Drunk Rafael Barba, Episode: s16e17 Parole Violations, Fluff, Jazz - Freeform, Lawyer Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr., Let Rafael Barba Say Fuck, M/M, Meeting the Parents, Oblivious Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr., POV Rafael Barba, Pining Rafael Barba, Post-Episode: s16e17 Parole Violations, Pre-Rafael Barba/Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr., Rafael Barba Sings, Slow Dancing, Song: Moondance (Van Morrison), Sweet Dominick "Sonny" Carisi Jr., Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Weddings, also every time i listen to moondance i see this now, uncle sonny is the cutest shit y'all
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-12
Updated: 2019-10-12
Packaged: 2020-11-28 00:09:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,315
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20957213
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/octothorpetopus/pseuds/octothorpetopus
Summary: When Sonny RSVP'd to his sister's wedding, he checked yes for a plus-one. It was some combination of optimism and wishful thinking. Now, three months later, he's in a bit of a pickle. Lucky for him, his sister's got an easy solve.





	Moondance

"I am not asking Rafael goddamn Barba to be my plus-one to your wedding, Bella!" Rafael pauses outside his office, his coffee frozen halfway to his lips. He steps out for one freakin' second to get some coffee before he loses his epic shit at Calhoun, who will not stop pestering him about a deal for her client (who's 100% guilty, and he and the entire human population that owns a TV know it) and now there's a screaming man in his office. Yay.

He peeks through the blinds and rolls his eyes. It's Carisi. Of course. Why wouldn't it be? Just the cherry on top of the steaming pile of shit that has been Tuesday. He doesn't need any visits right now, much less from annoyingly pretty detectives that are completely oblivious to every advance he's made over the past year while still maintaining that ambiguously affectionate smirk that makes Rafael want to grab him by the tie and kiss him until he can't breathe.

And still, as irked as being near Carisi without being _with _him makes Rafael, he suddenly finds himself wishing he'd gotten that second coffee he'd briefly considered in his manic caffeine trip, just so he had something to offer him, something that might allow their fingers to touch for just a moment, so Rafael can feel his heart stop, drop, and roll all the way into the pit of his stomach, so he can feel himself turn dizzy and stupid like a vapid sixteen year old girl fawning over the quarterback.

But there's no turning back, and he straightens, marching into the office like he owns the place (which he sort of does).

"Carisi," he says, tossing his briefcase on the table in the middle of the office and toppling into the leather massage chair behind the desk. He kicks his feet up on the corner of the desk and studies Carisi momentarily. "What are you doing in my office? It's, like, six o'clock." Carisi fixes him with an odd look and pulls the cell phone he's talking on away from his face.

"It's nine," he says, and leans back into the phone. "Look, Bells, I gotta call you back. Yeah. Yep. Love you too." He hangs up and slides the phone into his pocket. "Uh, Liv wanted me to bring over some case files. Tom Zimmerman- defense lawyer who pushed his crimes off on his client. It's disgusting."

"I heard. You were U.C. on this one, weren't you? At that shelter?' Carisi nods and looks like he's just swallowed something bitter. He's freshly shaven and his hair's just been brushed back, without any of the usually substantial amounts of gel holding it back. He can't have been out long, and he looks tired. Older. "Is that it?" Rafael asks expectantly, holding out his hand for the files.

"Yeah." Rafael raises an eyebrow. "Well, no. I was just on the phone with my sister, Bella- you remember Bella?"

"Of course. She's had her baby, presumably?"

"Yeah, he's real cute, I can show you some pictures later, if you want-" Sonny stops, composing himself. He's even hotter when he's excited, Rafael thinks. It's fucking awful. "Anyway, she and Tommy are finally getting married, and their wedding's this weekend, and-"

"Congratulations, now get to the point." Rafael nearly winces at his own harsh tone. It's hard to turn off court mode, but even more than that, he's scared of what he might do if he turned court mode off.

"Sorry, counselor. When I RSVP'd, I checked the plus one box, and long story short, I didn't really have time to find a plus one. So my sister, she just called me, and she's a little P.O.'d, 'cause I told her I'd have someone by now, and-"

"Carisi. What happened to long story short?"

"Fuck. Sorry. The point is, she and Tommy are still real thankful for everything you did for 'em last year. So she was wonderin' if you'd be my plus one." There it is. He heard it before, out in the bullpen (Christ, Sonny's loud. Is he that loud during sex? Wait. Fuck. Not the point.)

"When's the wedding?" he hears himself ask. He doesn't recall the decision to ask. In fact, his mind is like a frozen TV, where the audio keeps playing but there's just a single picture on the screen. In this case, one of his heart mid-explosion.

"Saturday, five o'clock." Rafael thinks.

"I think I can make that work." Carisi starts, his blue eyes wide.

"You're serious?"

"Yeah, why the hell not? I like Bella, and I'm always up to put on a suit and eat some free food." Carisi smiles, his dimples maddeningly deep.

"Great. I mean, uh, cool. I'll pick you up at noon on Saturday."

"Noon? I thought you said the wedding was at five!"

"It's in Montauk and I'm Tommy's best man, so I gotta be there early." Rafael scowls, but it's more playful than angry. "Look, I'm sure Bella and Tommy'll be real happy to see you. Again." Carisi shifts from foot to foot. Rafael raises his hand to point towards the door.

"I'll see you on Saturday at eight, Carisi. But until then, please get the hell out of my office." Carisi obliges, and Rafael slumps down in his seat, his head lolling back. Never in a million years did he ever anticipate being Sonny Carisi's date to his sister's wedding. And yet, here he is. And he has never felt stupider, or gayer, in his life.

Carisi is outside the door to his apartment building at promptly twelve o'clock Saturday morning, pushing the buzzer irritably. Rafael watches him from his second floor apartment. He cracks the window and calls down:

"Cool it, Carisi, I'll be down in a minute!" Carisi steps back, his hands raised in a reluctant surrender. Rafael slams the window shut and turns back to his bedroom, chewing his bottom lip. "Shit." He digs through his substantial closet and eventually decides on his second-favorite khaki suit (his first favorite is at the dry cleaners) with his blue and white plaid tie. It's a hell of a look, the perfect suit to silently thirst over his coworker in during the three hour drive to Montauk. And then for the next several hours at Bella's wedding. Maybe they'll dance. Unlikely, but it's possible. The mere thought of it sends Rafael into what can only be referred to as a Thirst Spiral. It takes him several minutes to recover, fewer than it takes him to get dressed and grab a bottle of iced coffee from the fridge. He's ready in ten, out the front door in fifteen.

"Morning," he mutters, chugging the coffee.

"It's noon, Barba."

"On a _Saturday. _That's morning for me." Carisi laughs and leans against what must be his car. It's a vintage Chevy convertible, looks mid-60s. Not, frankly, what Rafael would've guessed. Carisi strikes him as more of a Prius guy,

"It was my dad's," Carisi explains before Rafael can even ask. "From when he was in his twenties. When I was a teenager, he roped me into fixing it up with him. Either he thought it'd keep me out of trouble, or that learning how to fix cars would get me to stop liking boys-" Rafael nearly chokes on his coffee. He has never heard Carisi openly admit to being bi or gay or whatever the hell he is, although that's not to say he hasn't suspected. But he manages to pass it off as a cough, allergies or some shit. "-but now I can replace an alternator and Tinder still shows me both men and women, so..." He shrugs, and Rafael can't help but laugh as he gets in the passenger seat. Carisi looks at him warmly for a moment, then gets in next to him and turns the car on.

The Montauk wind whips through Rafael's hair as they park along the edge of the beach, looking out at the gray ocean splashing before them. 

“It’s kind of chilly for a beach wedding,” he says.

”You try telling my sister that. April in Montauk's been her dream since she was seven. At least it’s not raining.” That much is true, at least so far. Rafael takes a seat on the Carisi side of the aisle, in the far back, trying to shrink away from friends and family as best he can. He doesn't belong here, that is the overwhelming feeling. But all of that dissipates when the music begins, a single violin beside the floral arch, playing what Rafael recognizes as the Love Theme from Romeo and Juliet. And then he sees Carisi, holding the arm of a woman that could only be one of his sisters- they share the same sharp features and keen eyes. He takes his place beside the arch and meets Rafael's eyes, smiling wider than Rafael thinks he's ever seen. It takes everything he has to hold Carisi's gaze, not blush and look away.

It's a classic catholic wedding, as Rafael expected. He watches in pleasant silence, noticing how beautiful Bella looks, how much more relaxed Tommy seems, and of course, how proud Carisi looks. It's fucking adorable.

The gray sky begins drizzling about halfway through the ceremony, and at almost the exact moment that the priest says, "I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss-" it opens up in a torrential downpour, catching Bella and Tommy in the middle of a passionate embrace. They spring apart, surprised but laughing, and sprint down the sandy aisle towards the massive lodge on the other end of the beach. Rafael and Carisi, both already soaked almost all the way through, meet each other's eyes and freeze for a moment. Then Carisi takes off after his sister, snagging Rafael's hand on the way and dragging him, laughing and stumbling, behind him. It is at this precise moment that Rafael stops feeling the rain. He stops feeling everything, in fact, everything except the feeling of Carisi's hand in his, how _perfectly _it fits. By the time they reach the building, heat and light radiating off of it, they are well and truly drenched. Carisi shakes his hair out like a dog fresh in out of the rain, and it splays out in a mess of gray-brown spikes, all of the gel washed out of it. He pushes it back into place as best he can, but it's still a mess. A stunning, soaking, make-your-heart-stop mess.

"So... cocktails?" he asks, and Rafael laughs.

"Yes, please."

The rest of the guests arrive shortly, and caterers in pressed shirts and vests that make Rafael feel self-conscious about his own style choices pass out drinks (French 75s and a scotch older than Carisi) and hors d'oeuvres (mini meatballs). And then they move into the ballroom and Rafael takes a seat at table 1. If he weren't feeling self-conscious yet, he sure as hell is now. He sits with Carisi on one side, and Carisi's grandparents on the other, with two of his aunts and uncles across from him. He should not be at this wedding, and he certainly should not be _here. _But then he looks over at Carisi, who smiles, and his heart melts, and he stays.

Bella and Tommy enter after a few moments of uncomfortable small talk (Rafael doesn't understand half of it. Maybe it's the Italian of it all, or that apparently all of the Carisis talk as fast as the detective). They dance, and then dinner is served. It's Italian (obviously), but Rafael has literally never said no to free pasta in his life. It's also phenomenal lasagna, Carisi's grandma's recipe, apparently. Then it's time for Carisi's toast.

He stands, buttoning his suit coat, and gives Rafael a quick smile that makes his heart jump into his throat.

"For those of you who don't know, this actually isn't Bella's first wedding." Everyone, including Bella, raises their eyebrows at Carisi in confusion. "Her first wedding," he continues, "was in the third grade to Joey Cassidy. The ceremony, unfortunately, ended early, because Joey's friends were playing kickball and it was Joey's turn to pitch. Now, I'm pretty confident that this wedding is not only a lot more legally binding, but is a lot stronger than anything my sister ever had with any other guy, especially Joey Cassidy. Now, my sister has always been my best friend. We tell each other everything, y'know? Since we were kids, she was my other half- she was who I told when I stole Rolos from the bodega on the corner, when I got beat up by this kid on the rival baseball team, when I had a new crush-" his eyes flick towards Rafael. Or do they? He can't quite tell. "-or a new enemy that she needed to beat up for me." He pauses a beat for laughter, which he gets. "So when she told me that she thought Tommy might be 'the one', I believed her. And I have watched Tommy and Bella for almost seven years. Even if she hadn't told me that ten weeks in, I would have known. It's in the way they look at each other when we're playing charades on game night. It's in the way they always yell almost the exact same thing at the hockey refs when they mess up the call. It's in their kid, how he somehow looks just like both of them. I've never seen two people more in love, more right for each other. And all I hope, other than Bella and Tommy's eternal happiness, is that someday I have something just like this." He looks right at Rafael, he's sure of it now, and sits back down next to him. Rafael's so numb from just having been _looked _at that the next half an hour or so is just a straight-up blur of overthinking and emotional breakdowns. 

"...dance?" He snaps out of it.

"Huh?"

"I said," Carisi says, rolling his eyes. "do you want to dance?" Rafael blinks twice, shocked.

"What, like, together?"

"We don't have to. It's not prom. I just figured, since we're here, and technically you're my plus one... look, it's 2017, Rafael. And I'm out to my family. It's not really that weird for two guys to dance together anymore, but-"

"I- that's not what I meant, Carisi. I was just a little freaked, that's all. But yes. I would like to dance." Carisi takes Rafael's hand for the second time that night and tugs him gently out onto the dance floor. It's a jazz band, and an excellent one at that.

"My cousin," Carisi explains, nearly shouting.

"He's pretty good!" Rafael shouts back. They're playing "Moondance" by Van Morrison, and Carisi leads Rafael in a quick two-step. He's actually a pretty solid dancer. Rafael is positive Carisi can feel his pounding heartbeat against his chest. He can feel Carisi's. It's keeping in time with the music. Rafael laughs as Carisi spins him under his arm and pulls him back, nearly toppling both of them to the ground. His eyes drift up to meet Carisi's, and he thinks he almost sees Carisi lean down for a moment.

"Mr. Barba!" Whatever might have been happening is over as soon as Bella and Tommy approach. Both are red-faced and out of breath, but literally glowing.

"Mr. and Mrs. Sullivan. It's nice to see you again." He stiffens in surprise as Bella wraps her arms around him and squeezes. "And please, it's your wedding, call me Rafael."

"Then call me Bella," she responds, smiling broadly.

"Fine," he concedes.

"Hey, if we're talking about names, will you finally start calling me Sonny?" Rafael rolls his eyes. "C'mon, we're not at work."

"Fine. Dominick." Carisi shrugs.

"I'll take it." As Rafael turns to talk to Tommy, he thinks he sees Bella wink at Carisi- Sonny- Dominick- whatever the fuck his name is. Anyway, it's weird.

"How are you doing, Tommy?" Tommy smiles, and he looks genuinely happy.

"Really well, actually. It's been tough, but I haven't thought about... what happened... in awhile. Although, that might be the sleep deprivation from staying up all night with the baby." Rafael claps Tommy's shoulder.

"I'm glad to hear it." Tommy turns back to Bella.

"Should we keep doing our rounds, Bell?" They slip away, and almost unconsciously, Carisi's arm slides around Rafael's waist. Rafael holds his breath, terrified that any move might make him implode.

"I'm going to get some air," he says, gently (and reluctantly) removing Carisi's arm from his hips and pushing away. His chest is tight, like it's been filled with molten steel that is steadily drying. He cannot breathe, or speak. He can barely move. Outside, it's legitimately cold, no longer just cool, and the rain has steadied to a light drizzle. He leans against the railing, trying to catch his breath, his eyes fixed on the moonlit reflection of the rising tide. He can still feel Carisi's hand on his waist, on his shoulder, on the small of his back as they danced, more easily than breathing.

"Hey." Rafael nearly jumps. But it's only Carisi. Only Carisi, who is he kidding? It's never _only _Carisi. It's never been only Carisi. "You ran outta there pretty quick. Did I scare you off?" Rafael shakes his head and looks back out at the ocean. "Look, Rafael, I'm glad you came with me tonight."

"Like I said. Free food, an excuse to put on a fancy suit, I'm here."

"But that's not the only reason you came, is it?" It's a legit question, not rhetorical. Rafael almost wishes it were rhetorical. That would mean Carisi already knew the answer to his question, and Rafael wouldn't be struggling over his answer.

"I... no. It's not."

"Why?" Rafael squeezes his eyes, shut hoping this is a dream, a nightmare, really, and that if he just manages to get past the abstract shapes swimming in his vision, it'll all be over and he'll wake up in his Upper East Side apartment and he'll still be in love with Dominick Carisi but he won't be here and he won't have to say it out loud. "Why?" Carisi asks again, and the words still won't come. There are no words, he realizes, in the first moment of clarity he's had all day. There are only actions. Actions speak louder than words, isn't that what they say? So he acts. He leans forward, but they're so close it doesn't take much to close the gap, to press his lips ever so gently to Dominick's, his eyes fluttering shut as he melts into the kiss. And Dominick doesn't pull away, that's the first thing he notices. He leans in, and slides his hand under Rafael's sport coat to press into the small of his back. They only break when the rain starts to pound down again, soaking them through once again. They spring apart, surprised, but laughing.

"Back inside?" Dominick asks, and Rafael nods, once again at a loss for words. He takes Carisi's hand for the third time that night and allows himself to be led inside. Only this time, when they get back in, they don't let go.

"Another dance?" Rafael grins and kisses Dominick's cheek.

"I'd dance with you a thousand more times, Dominick. And then one more, for good measure. Because you are a dream come true."

They don't dance a thousand more times, at least not that night. But when Carisi drops Rafael off outside his apartment building just past 1 in the morning, and they kiss goodbye, there is some kind of mutual understanding that those first ten dances are just the first of many, many more. And when Rafael drifts off to sleep, he dreams of a million more dances and that cool, rainy April night in Montauk.


End file.
